Week 6 Storytelling: Not the Cows

     "Gentleman, I am pleased that all of you are here to discuss our grave situation," announced Prince Uttara to his audience of soldiers and commanding officers. The war room was buzzing with rumors about what could have possibly happened in the middle of the night to call for an emergency war meeting. Arjuna, disguised as Brihannala, was invited to attend the meeting as a special guest, but, just like the other officials, he was unaware of the problem at hand. Prince Uttara spots Arjuna in the crowd and calls him forth, "Brihannala! My loyal friend and ally! I have a very important mission for you, my friend." As Arjuna made his way through the crowd, he pondered what he could have done to be called upon by the prince himself! He knows my true identity. He knows I'm a Pandava! thought Arjuna. He stood by the prince with a collected composure, but in his mind he was terrified at the consequences that he could suffer.

     "Now,you must be wondering why I have called upon my best men at the darkest hour of the night. Well, let me tell you that a great injustice has occurred!" Prince Uttara's voice boomed across the hall which rallied his men with indignation towards the mysterious injustice.

"We are a proud kingdom! We fight as brothers against any enemy that has wronged us!" The prince's words encouraged louder rally cries among his soldiers. Arjuna's palms became sweaty, and his heart was pounding in his chest. He has to know. He's showing them that I am the enemy. I have to get out of here! Arjuna was looking for an escape route when Prince Uttara shouted, "I am infuriated with Duryodhana and his friends! They have kidnapped my father, your king, and are holding him prisoner!" Arjuna immediately let out a sigh of relief. Oh thank goodness it's just Duryodhana. The crowd roared with anger and cursed Duryodhana's name.

"My brothers, that's not the worst of it!" Arjuna gave Prince Uttara a puzzled look. What could be worse than your father, the king of this nation, being held prisoner? Prince Uttara stood at his podium in silence. His face showed mixed emotions of pain, hatred, and sorrow. The prince angrily pounded his fist against the podium and looked away from the crowd to hide the stream of tears running down his face. The soldiers were becoming uneasy... What has happened that made the prince, the bravest commanding officer, break down? With a quiver in his voice, Prince Uttara spoke, "Duryodhana's ally, Susharman.... He... He took our COWS!" Silence. The audience had a defeated look on their faces. It was as if someone had ripped their souls out of their bodies. Arjuna's jaw dropped in disbelief. COWS?! MY SLEEP WAS DISRUPTED FOR SOME STUPID FAT COWS!? Prince Uttara noticed Arjuna's reaction and embraced him, "It's ok brother! I see the pain in your eyes. I feel the anger that you feel in the depths of your heart! I knew you would understand the severity of our situation better than any soldier here, which is why I am appointing you as my chief charioteer! Side by side, we will destroy the heathens that have robbed our precious gems AND SAVE OUR COWS!" The crowd bellowed their deepest hatred and cries against the cow raiders!

"Kill kidnappers!"
"Slaughter the villains!"
"Save the cows!"

Arjuna could not fathom the insanity. The king was kidnapped and no one bats an eye. Someone raids the cows and everyone loses their minds! Prince Uttara then commands, "Men, secure the kingdom! Brihannala and I must confront the enemy and return the cows!" The prince and Arjuna then exit the thundering hall of riled up men. While Arjuna prepared the chariot, he asked, "My good prince, what about your father? Are we not rescuing him?"

"My father? OH YEAH! He is held prisoner isn't he... Ok hm well we can make a detour to rescue him but we MUST save the cows first.Cows first. Then my dad. But remember cows first." Arjuna gave the prince a cock-eyed look. This is absolutely ridiculous. With one quick crack of the whip, Prince Uttara and Arjuna trotted off to save the cows! And maybe the king.

A cow waiting to be rescued. Source.

Author's Note:
      In the original story, Arjuna, disguised as Brihannala in the king's court, accompanies Prince Uttara as the prince's charioteer to confront Susharman and save King Virata. Before saving the king, Susharman raided the king's cattle, leading to a battle to save the cattle. The prince was unable to confront the enemy so Arjuna takes over and defeats everyone, thus saving the king.
     In my story, I decided to make the main focus on the cows because cows are awesome. When I was reading the epic, it just cracked me up that someone would go through the trouble to steal some cows. I guess that's an ancient military tactic to cut off food sources perhaps? I imagined that the prince made a dramatic announcement to his army that the cows were being stolen, and at least one person had to question the validity of the meeting. I also used a line from the Dark Knight (as some of you may have noticed). The original quote can be found here. The story was supposed to be harmless, but I have realized that in some cultures cows are sacred. I'd just like to point out that I did not mean to offend anyone or any culture. I personally think cows the best farm animals. Just look at that image! It makes me want to keep a cow as a pet, but I'm also conflicted with my love for burgers...

Bibliography: The Mahabharata: A Shortened Modern Prose Version of the Indian Epic by R. K. Narayan (1978)